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Vodka and – – –

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And you thought vodka was for drinking only…

1. To remove a bandage painlessly, saturate the bandage with vodka. The stuff dissolves adhesive. (Really? – one for the bandage one for me!!)

2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers, fill a trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the caulking, let set five minutes and wash clean. The alcohol in the vodka kills mold and mildew. (Fill the spray bottle, spray onto the bathtubs showers, caulking etc. and then spray some in your mouth while you are waiting the 5 minutes).

3. To clean your eyeglasses, simply wipe the lenses with a soft, clean cloth dampened with vodka. The alcohol in the vodka cleans the glass and kills germs. (Try this at the office!)

4. Prolong the life of razors by filling a cup with vodka and letting your safety razor blade soak in the alcohol after shaving. The vodka disinfects the blade and prevents rusting.  (Also makes for an interesting morning!).

5. Spray vodka on wine stains, scrub with a brush, and then blot dry.  (Suck up both the wine and vodka with a straw and have the party all over again!)

6. Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face as an astringent to cleanse the skin and tighten pores.  (I also apply it to my throat with ice in a nice bar glass)

7. Add a jigger of vodka to a 12-ounce bottle of shampoo. The alcohol cleanses the scalp,removes toxins from hair, and stimulates the growth of healthy hair. (To Hell with Rogaine!)

8. Fill a sixteen-ounce trigger-spray bottle with vodka and spray bees or wasps to kill them.  (The bees will appreciate the effort and will not sting you – but ask for more)

9. Pour one-half cup vodka and one-half cup water into a Ziploc freezer bag and freeze for a slushy, refreshing ice pack for aches, pain or black eyes.  (Add lime-aide and you have a refreshing after-school drink)

10. Fill a clean, used mayonnaise jar with freshly packed lavender flowers, fill the jar with vodka, seal the lid tightly and set in the sun for three days. Strain liquid through a coffee filter, then apply the tincture to aches and pains.  (Shit, just drink the vodka and aches/pains will subside)

11. To relieve a fever, use a washcloth to rub vodka on your chest and back as a liniment.  (See #10)

12. To cure foot odor, wash your feet with vodka. (Whiskey/Tango/Foxtrot!!)

13 Vodka will disinfect and alleviate a jellyfish sting.  (If only the beach patrol in Volusia County FL understood this!!!)

14. Pour vodka over an area affected with poison ivy to remove the urushiol oil from your skin.  (Ahh – yes, the dreaded urushiol oil – Drink the vodka and scream with pain, I say!  Someone will come and piss on your leg – ((uric acid)) )

15. Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth. Allow your gums to absorb some of the alcohol to numb the pain.  (Repeat every ten minutes til the tooth dissolves)

For any of the above – in these times –  I wouldn’t reach to the top-shelf stuff.  I do believe and I spend time when I’m in the liquor store – looking for vodka that is made from potatoes.  If its from GRAIN – of any sort – its just grain alcohol! and is as good as SU2000!

Potato Vodka


Written by sorrentolens

November 2, 2009 at 5:44 pm